Denver Post alumna suggests single invitation replaces pre-death letters

Giselle M. Massi, a former reporter for The Denver Post, has proposed a streamlined method for communicating with past and present acquaintances before death or incapacity. Massi, who writes the advice column Tell Giselle, suggests that a single, formal invitation can serve the same purpose as a series of specific letters intended to minimize regret.

The concept addresses the common fear of leaving relationships unresolved. Massi notes that accidents and unexpected life changes often prevent people from completing reconciliation. She argues that individuals rarely get the chance to express affection or respect in real time, such as through a kiss or a hug, before a final separation occurs.

Traditional advice on this topic often involves writing multiple letters to different people. These documents typically cover a spectrum of emotions, ranging from declarations of deep love to permanent goodbyes. Other common variations include apologies for past mistakes and explanations of specific errors, sometimes qualified with the word but.

Massi contends that while these sentiments are valuable, they lack efficiency. She believes that specific letters often leave out too much information, which can lead to a need for further explanation, clarification, or backtracking. Her alternative approach consolidates these messages into one universal communication.

The proposed method involves sending a single invitation to a specific person. This message can be delivered via snail mail, electronic invite card, text message, or voicemail. Massi describes the process as simple, allowing the sender to address the recipient in one fell swoop rather than drafting multiple documents.

A sample template provided by Massi begins by acknowledging that the recipient may experience surprise or shock. The sender then shares sincere wishes for the recipient's peace, health, and happiness. The invitation asks the recipient to open their heart and mind for the duration of the message.

According to the template, accepting the invitation signifies that the relationship between the two people was meaningful and unforgettable. The message encourages both parties to remember the innocence and guilelessness with which they were born. Massi states that this purity was often derailed by ignorance, fear, misinformation, or miscommunication, rather than by malignant narcissism or evil.

The letter asserts that unconditional love, though sometimes hidden, never completely vanished. The sender expresses a desire to help the recipient remember their capacity for love. Massi notes that there is no need for the recipient to explain or apologize, as the authenticity of their love is considered a given.

Massi describes this invitation as the first of potentially many future connections. She states that she is open to sharing more time and space with the recipient if they wish to connect in a state of reclaimed purity. The message concludes with the belief that the two people entered each other's lives to facilitate learning, growth, and the mastery of love and forgiveness.

Massi has written three books, including the novel Just Dance the Steps and a romantacy titled WYNTER'S DREAM. She worked as a journalist for The Denver Post for 16 years. She currently writes the Tell Giselle column for the newspaper. Her contact information is available at www.gisellemassi.com.